Once his fingers were in my
mouth, he demanded the location of the rebel base. When he went on to ask if I had any
teeth-related problems, I decided to fully cooperate in the hope of getting off
for good behavior. So I replied honestly: "I have a reoccurring nightmare
that my teeth are falling out!" The words fell out of my open mouth before
I realized that my dentist probably didn't care about that sort of problem. His response, however, upped the ante.
He laughed. Not because what I
said was funny; this wasn’t a Santa Clause laugh. It was a maniacal laugh that
really lent itself to the mental picture of me being interrogated by an evil
agent. "Mwahaha!” he cackled. “Our propaganda is working!"
Needless to say, I think I must
have the best dentist in the world. ...Or the worst.
Either way, Dr. Smith has
convinced me to religiously brush my teeth twice a day. (Religiously, in this
case, means that I do my best, but I’m far from perfect.) How did he do that?
Because his propaganda worked.
We are all message-carriers.
Every time we open our mouths to talk, we are trying to convey the message in
our minds into someone else's mind; we’re trying to make our propaganda work.
Some of us are good at it: I went to school with some of the top communicators
in the country--their mountains debate trophies are evidence of that. I,
however, often find it difficult to get my message across. One of the biggest battles
when convincing anyone of anything is keeping them from jumping to conclusions
about what you mean.
Sometimes, the words we use
distract from the message we are trying to get across. For example, when you
talk about voting, many people will hear one political buzz word and write you
off as a crazy person. You say that you’re "Conservative" and they
put you in a box of being close minded and wanting to repress gay people. I've
had people accuse me of that to my face (as well as to my Facebook). They
assume all kinds of things without asking me any questions.
These people get bogged down
before I can even get to the point of what I am trying to say. They put me and
my ideas in a box.
I struggle to communicate in ways
that don't put me in a box. Once you are in a box, you’re separated from
whoever you’re talking to and you’re easily ignored. So, the trick is to try to
get inside someone else’s box. Sometimes you can turn the tables by figuring
out which box they’re in. Then, you can find the words to connect with them.
For example, if they are self-identified
as politically independent, go out of your way to build credibility. Show them
that you’re not in anyone's pocket. Show that you care about the same sort of things
that they care about and learn as much of their "language" as you
can.
Really, that’s the key to any
communication: speaking the right language. If you want to talk with someone
from Siberia, I recommend you learn Russian. It is a simple concept, when you
think about it.
What’s more important than what
we think we’re saying is what the other person is hearing. No matter how right
we think we are, if the message doesn't make it from us to them, no one will be
better off. It’s better to keep silent then to have your words miss the mark
entirely.
So here are some tricks I use to
make sure that my message gets across:
1.
Listen first. You can’t know what language to use if
you don't listen first and find out.
2.
Don't use "insider words" when talking with
outsiders.
3.
Stay focused on your main point. People like to get
distracted by side issues because it allows them to write you off. Don't let
them--stay on target!
I know I still have a lot to learn
about this, so have you found any ways to make your propaganda work with people?
Posted by Jeremiah Lorrig
Those devious dentists.... ;)
ReplyDeleteYou are very right when you stress the importance of establishing to your audience that you are not categorically in one camp or another. Rather we should demonstrate that we are standing on principle...a word which is foreign to a majority of politicians in America today; Democrat, Republican, and Conservative alike.
ReplyDeleteOn another note, the amount of power that a dentist has when he has his hands in your mouth is frightening!